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A: Our culture has traditionally rejected outside-the-norm or non-vanilla sexual practices or preferences as strange, wrong, or bad.
The truth is that odds are, your fetish (clinically termed paraphilia—more background on fetishes here) isn’t going away and you can’t keep it under wraps forever.The pelvic floor muscles form a thick sling that supports your vagina, uterus, ovaries, bowel, and bladder.It weakens naturally over time due to things like weight gain, lifting heavy objects, frequent coughing or sneezing, and constipation. Doing kegels can strengthen the muscles, prevent incontinence, and enhance orgasmic pleasure.When you feel ready to bring it up, do so without shame or fear, but know that surprise and withdrawal might be his or her immediate reaction, until getting used to the idea.Give him or her time to warm up to your newly honest sexual identity.If you want to do something else, get vaginal weights.
Insert them daily and walk around with them inside your vagina for 10 minutes a day. Keep doing it every once in awhile for maintenance.
Be wary of other products that promise to tighten your vagina.
Only use ones that are organic and can have a short-term tightening effect for a particular sexual session—like this one, my personal favorite.
If a partner insists on anal when it’s not your jam, kick his butt out the door. I know it doesn’t feel great when your boyfriend seemingly prefers spending time masturbating to porn stars rather than having sex with you.
So, it does make sense to talk about it—and talking about porn, as with talking about sexuality in general, can be touchy.
You may well be surprised at how this gives your partner permission to get real about his or her own sexual interests.